Pounding the keyboard

As opposed to pounding the pavement.

Well, my foray into the ethereal world of online love has proven all but fruitless.  I would have thought that by this time, i.e. 13.78 days into it, that I'd have a filadex of lovers on the go, with little time for anything else.  Needless to say, I have been sadly mistaken and Mr GE remains ever elusive. Bastard.

This is what I can tell you so far.  I should take it back just a fraction and tell you that my first attempt at online dating ended disasterously.  I foolishly set about filling in one of those ridiculous surveys which is supposed to miraculously match you up with a swag of fellas, only to find that having completed it one hour later, that I was rejected by the website.  Who gets rejected by a website?  No, let me answer that question. I insist.  It was me.  I think it had to do with the fact that I was honest and these websites are simply not designed for honesty.

Anyway, that put me off for about a week. And after being cajoled and encouraged by my work colleagues, who might I add present with several character traits that could in certain circumstances be construed as, borderline stalker material (no offence intended), I decided to give it another go.

After getting my profile up on another website, I had what could be considered moderate success.  One email, and several 'kisses'.  Seeing some of the photos and profiles, you want to be sure that said kisses were of the air type, not full on tongue twisting snogs, although in my current state, you can't be too choosy.  With some work colleague coaching I got a bit of 'flow' happening.  Get a kiss in, send a kiss back.  Get an email in, get an email back.  No wait, I think it was more like, get an email in, send one back, then get another email in, send a text, get a text, chat on the phone, arrange to meet up, then nothing.  Or it was a bit of get a kiss, send a kiss, then nothing.  I mean this all seems so weird.

The good news is that I did receive one email from a guy that we (my and my work colleagues, and yes, we have a team thing going on; I would have no staying power without them) have affectionately called 'WarandPeace' for the lengthy tome he penned.  It came to pass that we met for a coffee and all I can say is that it's a good thing I've kept my expectations low because they are being met on all fronts.  I mean I did have some sympathy for the guy because he'd had the full spectrum of online dating disasters from stalker to psycho-single-mother to crazy-old-lady-who's-a-true-player-for-real and his wife did leave him for her best friend's brother who had cancer and has since died.  Let's face it, online dating throws every possible weirdo into a scary little mix and they all congregate there for a good time.

To be fair, it hasn't been all bad.  I have learnt some really useful new acronyms.  lol, which I thought meant, 'little old lady' actually stands for 'laugh out loud', and NMP, which means, not my problem (from WarandPeace), and my absolute favourite, gsoh, which I thought stood for 'great set of hooters', but in actual fact, means, 'good sense of humour'.  Well, what a relief.